10 Great Things About People You Don’t Like

quote The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed. Carl Gustav Jung

**If you are not in a leadership role and/or you want to stay with your current notions then this article is not for you.**

There is a current trend to detach from people you don’t like. Leaders can’t always choose the people who surround them. And, based on my experience and observations, the least successful teams are those that have leaders who select people who they like or are like them.

Here is what you gain from having people you don’t like in your circle:

1. Focus
In leadership the goal and vision are more important then whether you like the person or not. If you are focused on not liking the person then you are not focused on the goal or vision. This annoyance is a good reminder for you to keep focused on your role, your job.

2. Open Mindedness
If you are more fixated on what you like or don’t like about someone, it is an indicator of a lack of openness and understanding from you. The ability to be open minded and curious are the core signs of intelligence and capability to see opportunity where others do not.

3. Growth
If people tell you only what you want to hear it is a sign that you will only get what you are willing to hear. Which means if you are limiting dialogue you are controlling growth. Your job is truly to unleash growth.

4. Improvement
For any initiative there are multiple ways to make it successful. The more you embrace understanding and appreciating all options, different ideas, and even pitfalls as relevant and integral to creating success the better you lead. If you are only looking for what is supporting your idea you will miss the extras to make it even better and additional ways to be prepared for potential issues.

5. Freshness
If you are putting people in a box then your thinking is in a box. People want leaders who have broad thinking, the capacity to see around the corner, and appreciate new thinking.

6. Relationship Development
If someone irritates you this is a message that you need to learn the skills to create a more proactive relationship with these types of individuals. Irritation is a true signal that it is time for you to meet the challenge and not run away.

7. Appreciation
When someone’s values are completely different than yours, it does not make them bad it makes them different. There are many ways to live, create, and achieve. The more you can learn from others the richer, more robust, and more effective options you’ll have for yourself and your company.

8. Respect
If someone is not treating you with respect, it is teaching you as a leader to step up your respect and appreciation game. Respect is earned and if someone is not respecting you it is a good time to reflect on what that means. Where are areas that you may not be respecting yourself? your team? your commitments? your company? your community?

9. Better Engagement
If someone is pointing out all the problems with a situation and what does not work for them, they are giving you an opportunity. It is easy to work with people who do exactly what you tell them, it is harder to develop the skills to engage others so that they offer new ways for the goals to be achieved. Learning how to help people be a part of the solution is a fundamental skill of leadership. Perhaps it is time to reflect on where could you be part of the solution in an area that you see problems?

10. Challenge
If someone has crazy ideas or practices that are not main stream but workable there is something to be learned here. Aristotle, Galileo, Curee, Ford, Einstein, Edison, Lowe, Jobs, Dell, etc. . they were all called crazy. How can you embrace ideas that are not your own for the good of the goal?

IMHO, the ability to embrace diversity of thought, learn to respect people you don’t like, and use irritation for growth is a foundational skill of leadership. Always remember leadership is not a position, it is a practice.